Monday, June 28, 2010

My Love, My Passion, My Hurt, My Life

Look over there to the right... you see that? It's a slideshow of some of my scrapbooking layouts I have done. Go me!

Why do I do it? I have been asked that question by a few of my friends that don't see my desire for it. They aren't scrapbookers, and they just can't understand why I get all excited if I find a pack of DCWV 12x12 paper stack on sale for $9.99

I am a pack rat by nature (I come by it honestly... you should see my parents house) but out of all of the things that they kept over the years, there isn't a ton of me in there. I mean, there are 3 pages filled out in my baby book. The kicker is... I am an only child.

So I have this unnatural desire to chronicle things in my life. The big and the small. I never want to forget what happened. (I could dig deeper and tell you that my grandmother had Alzheimer's Disease... and how that is one of my greatest fears... but I won't.) Besides... I don't think I am half bad at it.

See, I am one of those creative people... who doesn't have a creative bone in her body. I would love to be able to paint, to draw, to create... and the only thing I can seem to really do that is with paper. (Although, I do make forum signatures with Gimp and I don't think I am half bad at that either. LOL) It seems though that with photos and paper I can make things... things I like, and unless the world that I show my stuff too is blowing smoke up my butt, they seem to like them too.

I am not one of those "This is the latest trends" scrapbookers. Sure if something looks neat, I might pick it up, but... I am not the first one on the boat. Hell, the only reason I have a Cricut machine is because my dear Mother-in-Law gave me her old one. (But oh... I get it now... I so get it now...) I mean THIS looks like fun, but I won't be getting it anytime soon. (And for those out there keeping track... yeah I know it has been out for a while. LOL)

I am not one of those chronological scrapbookers either. I crop what I want, when I want. I have this awesome pic of Banana dressed up for school. She was rockin' the Hannah Montana/Miley Cyrus look. She was adorable. Like I said, so cute I took a pic. I chose the wrong size when I printed it out so I can't seem to make it fit on the layout how I want, so I have to get it redone. Am I done with her baby album? Nope. Hell I am not even done with Butter's and he is going to be 10 in September. I just now, after scrapbooking for almost 10 years, figured out how I am going to make layouts if there is more than one babe in them.

Another reason that keeps coming back to the forefront of my mind when I think about it (like for this post), is that there is no hard and fast rule to doing it like there are in so many other crafts. I can journal if I want, I can not journal if I don't want. If I want to do an album that is nothing but black and white photos I can. If I want to put red on every single layout I can. As long as I am happy with it, who cares.

I also am one of those scrapbookers that crop the "not so good times". After the rain is done pouring, and the sky clears from the darkness, you usually can see a rainbow... and those rainbows are usually the most beautiful we have ever seen. That is another reason I don't scrapbook chronologically... sometimes I can't face the not so good. It's just too much, too fresh in my head. It will get done, just when there isn't a scab to rip off. I don't show those layouts to others though... well The Chef sees them, and depending on what it is, I will show them to the babes, but no one else does. The things that are on those layouts are my pain, my hurt. Who wants to see that? And for me, doing the layouts of the "not so good times", it seems to help heal whatever bad thing it was.

Because see, these are my books... and my memories. They are telling the story that I want to tell. There are good stories, stories to make the time pass on a Saturday afternoon, stories that you consume like junk food, and there are stories that aren't so great, but it is what happened. These books are telling the stories of my life. The stories I never want to forget, the things I never want to lose. The things that I hope if when a future generation look at, they will see my love, my passion, my hurt, my life.

They will see...


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